Jealousy
by ani-chan7
Summary: Mio contemplates over her relationship with Kotarou and some of the new things that she is feeling. She also thinks about Kotarou and Tatsuki's relationship.


**Hello again! Its ani-chan7!**

**Just to tell you in this fanfic Mio is Out of Character. **

**Summary: While rushing to her date with Kotarou Mio contemplates over her relationship with him and how she's changed. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hands Off!**

**Warning: Depends on how you look at the relationship between Kotarou and Tatsuki. In my story I view it as a bit more than cousinly love. And there's just a teensy bit of bad language, but that's it!**

**Jealousy **

By Ani-chan7

"Ah! I'm late!" I accidentally say out loud as speed down the sidewalk to our meeting place. I'm so excited for my date with Kotarou today. Dating Kotarou has given me so many new feelings that I never experienced so strongly before. Some good, some bad. I never used have these feelings with my old boyfriends, uneasiness, doubt, possessiveness, in fact, it was usually the other way around. My old boyfriends got into a fight with any other boy that I talked to. When I got together with Kotarou I found his trust refreshing, I could talk to whomever I wanted without my boyfriend calling me a whore or causing a scene. But after a while I started to worry. Kotarou seemed too trusting. His trust soon seemed to turn into lack of Caring. It made me uneasy. It seemed like he didn't care if I talked to another boy. I know I sound crazy, but you would too if you knew Kotarou. I know that this is probably just a high school crush more than anything else, but I think that I'm… I think that I'm in love…

When I'm around Kotarou I feel… I feel like all is right with the world. One day before our date I felt awful. I was stressed out with exams and other school assignments, and my parents were forcing me into looking for a part time job to make some of my own money. Then I saw Kotarou. He smiled at me and laced his fingers together with mine. All of a sudden all of my negative feelings seemed to evaporate. I know that that sounds silly, but that's how I feel when I'm around Kotarou. I've never felt like this before.

But since I started dating Kotarou I have also started feeling other feelings that I have never felt towards a boy. Jealousy, possessiveness, and uneasiness. Especially with Kotarou's cousin, Tatsuki. I don't know what to think about those two. I don't know what's going on with them. I don't think that they know what's going on between them either, that's what bothers me the most. I know that they're cousins, and that nothing can ever happen, but still…

There are times when I see Kotarou looking at Tatsuki with a look of pure adoration. Whats even worse is when Tatsuki looks at Kotarou. He tries to hide his love for Kotarou, but I can tell, it's there, rearing its ugly head every time Tatsuki looks at Kotarou.

I'm not sure what to think about Tatsuki. Sometimes I feel like I hate him, like he's driving a wedge between me and Kotarou's relationship. But then I think that there would be no relationship if Tatsuki hadn't saved Kotarou every time Kotarou got in trouble, which happens very often. I am grateful when Tatsuki saves Kotarou, but at the same time I hate it. I hate how Tatsuki can always be there for Kotarou when I can't. I hate watching the reunion between the two after every near death experience that they encounter. I hate how it seems like Tatsuki can almost feel when Kotarou is in trouble, and that I can't. That's another thing I don't understand about those two.

I remember that one day when Tatsuki almost couldn't find Kotarou. He got so upset. I couldn't tell if he was mad at the ones who took Kotarou, or at himself… he got so nervous. He never gets nervous when looking for Kotarou; he normally always keeps his cool. Thinking back on it, it just goes to show how much Tatsuki really cares for Kotarou.

I hate when Tatsuki smiles at Kotarou. It's extremely rare, but that makes it even more special. I remember one day when Tatsuki went even so far as to hug Kotarou… Tatsuki hugged MY Kotarou! See what I mean by possessiveness! I never used to think like this! No one would ever suspect this of sweet little Mio as a possessive jealous bitch! I remember that day so clearly, it was when my old boyfriend, Tsutsui, came after Kotarou. Tatsuki was in the hospital. At the time I didn't think much of Tatsuki's and Kotarou's relationship, so of course I was there to comfort him. I was sitting on a chair by the side of his bed when Tatsuki woke up. He instantly questioned about Kotarou and bolted out the door. I was shocked. I was even more shocked when I found them later that day. Tatsuki had his head rested on an unconscious Kotarou's chest, with their fingers entwined together. I remember Yuuto's warning, he said, "I wouldn't look in there if I were you, you might get jealous." You know what, he was right.

The more I think about it the more I hate Tatsuki and Kotarou's relationship. I hate how I can't understand it. With Yuuto and Kotarou it's easy to understand. Yuuto's a goofball who likes to tease Kotarou. Whenever Yuuto hits on Kotarou, he does it to tease Kotarou, and I can tell he's joking.

Tatsuki does most of his displays of affection in private. I know that when Tatsuki hugs Kotarou, or on the once in the lifetime occasion, holds his hands, he is not joking. He is serious. I know that Tatsuki loves Kotarou, and it's not cousinly love either, oh no, it's much more.

I know that when Tatsuki and Kotarou were younger they were best friends, I know, Kotarou told me himself. I don't know what happened to bring them from friendship, to this. I remember one time, in the hospital, Kotarou was unconscious. He was mumbling in his sleep. I couldn't make out what he was saying until I leaned in closely, smiling at how cute he was. As soon as I heard what he said my smile dropped and was quickly replaced by a frown. "Tak-kun" That's what he said. Even in his sleep he was thinking about his cousin. His cousin, not me. So now it's understandable that I am immensely jealous of Tatsuki, isn't it?

At times I resent being older than Kotarou. I can't be in his class watching over him, making sure that none of the other girls in his grade dare to flirt with him. But from what I've heard, Tatsuki does a pretty good job of that. This angers me even more, this and the fact that they live together. I hate that I can't see what goes on between them at home. It sickens me thinking of what happens there. I guess I don't have to worry that much, from what I hear Tatsuki is an ass-whole 99 percent of the time. I smile at this. Tatsuki makes himself look bad so that I don't have to. I slap myself. I can't keep thinking like this. Kotarou is a great and trustworthy boyfriend! He would never chose Tatsuki over me! Come to think about it I'm a great girlfriend too. I bet all girlfriends go through this, but they usually go about despising other girls who talk to their boyfriends, not their boyfriends cousins.

I'm am a pretty good girlfriend though. I go to all of Kotarou's games. Then again so does Tatsuki. I always visit him in the hospital. Tatsuki does that too. Damn it! There has to be something that I can do that Tatsuki can't! I'm getting extremely aggravated now. What if… What if one day Kotarou does chose Tatsuki over me? I truly do care about Kotarou, and having him break up with me would leave me heartbroken! I hate worrying about this! Every time I think about Tatsuki and Kotarou's relationship I come to the same conclusion! I REALLY don't like Tatsuki. Everything would be so much easier if he were to just disappear! I realize that of all the feelings I feel in this relationship jealousy is definitely one of the strongest. I snap my self out of my thoughts as I see Kotarou waiting for me.

"Kotarou!" I say running up to him, "Sorry to keep you waiting!"

"It's Okay!" Kotarou smiles at me and grabs my hand within his own. Like always all of my feelings of jealousy, uneasiness, doubt, fear, and stress fades away. But not possessiveness. It's still there. I know it is, because without meaning to my hand sqeezes Kotarou's in a tight grip, threatening never to let go. I don't ever want to let Kotarou go. But a sense of understanding passes through me. I know one day that I will have to let go. Kotarou will probably go on to somebody else, maybe even Tatsuki. I smile at this, no longer angry or jealous at all at the thought of Tatsuki and Kotarou together. I know that if Kotarou and Tatsuki get together Kotarou will be in good hands, and that's enough for me! But until that day, I'll be here, next to Kotarou, until I have to let him go.

**So! What did ya think? Please review! It can be short or long I don't care! Just review! But No flames! **


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